The Monday Motivator | Stop Introvert Shaming

October 15, 2018

The Monday Motivator is a series meant to motivate, encourage, inspire and provide advice on real life stuff.*
One of my best friend's texted me on Saturday night and said, "I'm at home tonight reading, baking cookies and doing laundry" and in the following statement she said, "I'm so okay with it that I feel like I'm a different breed of 24 year old."

I couldn't help but giggle to myself and respond, "girl, that is literally my ideal night."  Because seriously, it is. 

Maybe it's a part of getting older. Or maybe it's just the deep down introvert inside me. But these days, I'll take a night in over a night out any day. Don't get me wrong; I love a night out with friends, doing something fun and unexpected, hopping bars or having a game night. But even though I enjoy that every so often, I don't want to do it every weekend. I like having me time; some time all to myself.

And guess what? That's A-OK.

We've become stuck in this twisted culture that A.) Loves when people cancel plans because "we didn't really want to go anyway" but B.) Is SO quick to judge when someone says "no" to hanging out because they're just not feeling it. How backwards is that? That most of us prefer laying low but can't be honest with ourselves because we are too busy shaming the people who ARE being honest.

I'm half extroverted, half introverted. Some people are total extroverts, which if you are, absolutely no judgement. Embrace it. But newsflash: some people are total introverts. And that's okay too.

I don't find too often that extroverts are shamed for being outgoing. In fact, many people look up to extroverts because they wish they could be a little more like them. But us folks with introverted qualities? We feel shamed all the time; if not by others, then by ourselves. Feeling guilty for taking a night off in your PJs with a large pizza? I mean c'mon. YOU DO YOU.

The fact of the matter is, we are all different. Maybe you can't wait to hit the town with your friends on a Friday night. (Do people still say "hit the town?")
Me? Friday nights are MINE. If I don't have to, I DON'T go anywhere. I enjoy a night at home after a long workweek because it's how I take care of myself.

So listen up: the next time your friend responds to your night out invite with a "I think I'll just stay in tonight," don't shame them for it. Don't go back and forth via text making them feel bad about it. Just tell them you'll see them next time. You never know what someone is going through, right?

Let's respect each other's differences. Be more understanding with each other's needs. And stop introvert shaming.

Be honest: you didn't feel like coming either.

I feel ya,

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